Despite grief being an emotional experience that we all share, awareness of it continues to be lacking. Certain types of grief are stigmatized or taboo to talk about. Other types of grief may be so large and painful that, when we see someone going through it, we feel helpless – we don’t know what to say.

August 30th is Grief Awareness Day. We’d like to take the opportunity to spread important information about grief, including how it affects us, what it can look like, and how to offer support to someone who’s going through it.

What are the different types of grief?

You may not have known that there are many different types of grief, which means that grief can look a multitude of different ways. Many people are familiar with typical grief, but sometimes, grief doesn’t look like you’d expect.

Officially, some experts say there are 3 types of grief (typical, complicated, and anticipatory) while others list 5 (the aforementioned 2, as well as acute grief and disenfranchised grief). Mental health experts also discuss traumatic grief, which is a type of complicated grief.

Here, we’re going over each of these 6 types of grief and how they can show up.

Typical grief

Typical grief, often called “normal” or “common” grief, is what most people think of when they hear the word “grief.” It’s the emotional response that follows a significant loss, usually the death of a loved one. This type of grief is marked by a range of emotions, including sadness, anger, confusion, and even relief, depending on the circumstances. These feelings might come and go, or they may persist for weeks or months as you adjust to life without the person you’ve lost.

However, it’s important to note that while this type of grief is often labeled “normal,” there’s really no single “normal” way to grieve. Everyone’s experience with grief is unique, and there’s no set timeline for how long it should last or what it should look like. The idea of “normal” grief can be misleading, as it implies that other forms of grief are somehow less valid or expected. In reality, all types of grief are “normal” responses to loss — each person grieves in their own way and at their own pace.

Complicated grief

Complicated grief is when the feelings of grief are intense, long-lasting, and disruptive to your daily life. Unlike typical grief, which tends to diminish (albeit slowly) over time, complicated grief persists and can even get worse. This type of grief can get in the way of your ability to function in everyday activities, which can leave you feeling stuck and unable to move forward.

For example, someone experiencing complicated grief might find themselves unable to return to work or engage in their regular activities months after a loss. They may be consumed by thoughts of the person they lost, struggle with intense longing, or even start to feel like life is meaningless without their loved one. This overwhelming grief often requires professional support to help you process and manage the emotions. That doesn’t mean that complicated grief is “wrong” or a mental illness – just that you might need some extra support.

Anticipatory grief

Anticipatory grief hits you before a loss actually happens, typically when you know that a significant loss is coming, like a terminal illness diagnosis. This type of grief allows you to start processing the impending loss in advance, which can sometimes help with the adjustment afterward. However, it can also be an emotional rollercoaster, because you might experience grief in waves while the person is still alive.

For example, if your partner has been diagnosed with a terminal illness, you might begin to grieve the loss of your future together before they even die. You might feel a mix of sadness, fear, and even guilt for grieving while they’re still alive. This type of grief can be very complex to deal with, and it can get difficult to grieve while you’re still providing care for your loved one.

Acute grief

Acute grief is the intense, immediate reaction to a loss, often experienced in the first days and weeks afterward. This type of grief is characterized by shock, disbelief, and a deep emotional pain that can feel overwhelming. Acute grief is a normal part of the grieving process, but it can be incredibly difficult to navigate as you’re suddenly confronted with the reality of your loss.

For example, after receiving the news of a sudden death, you might feel numb or disoriented, or even be in denial about what happened. You could also experience physical symptoms like trouble sleeping, loss of appetite, or fatigue. Acute grief is often the rawest form of grief, but it typically begins to lessen as you start to process your emotions and adapt to your new reality.

Disenfranchised grief

Disenfranchised grief is a type of grief that isn’t openly acknowledged, socially accepted, or publicly mourned. This can happen when the loss is seen as less significant or when societal norms dictate that your grief isn’t valid. It can also happen when you feel like you’re not allowed to express your love or grief openly. As a result, you might feel isolated or unsupported in your grief because others don’t recognize it as legitimate.

An example of disenfranchised grief could be the loss of a pet, a miscarriage, or the end of a relationship that others didn’t see as serious. People who were in relationships that were kept secret can also experience disenfranchised grief. After these losses, people might downplay your grief or tell you to “move on,” which can make it much harder for you to process and heal. This type of grief can be particularly painful because it often leaves you feeling like you have to hide your emotions.

Traumatic grief

Traumatic grief is a type of complicated grief that can happen when the loss is sudden, violent, or unexpected. This type of grief is often accompanied by symptoms of trauma, including flashbacks, nightmares, and severe anxiety. The combination of grief and trauma can make this type of grief extremely challenging, and it can sometimes lead to long-term psychological distress.

For example, losing a loved one in a car accident or to a violent crime can lead to traumatic grief. You might find yourself reliving the events surrounding the death or feeling an intense fear that something similar could happen again. The trauma aspect of this grief can complicate the healing process, and you may need professional support to get through it.

How to support someone who is grieving

Most of us aren’t aware of the different ways grief can present. When someone you know has experienced a loss, you might offer your condolences – but how can you truly support them emotionally? And how can you express your empathy when their grief is more complicated or acute?

Here are some tips.

1. Listen without judgment: Sometimes, the best support you can offer is a listening ear. Allow the person to share their feelings and experiences without interrupting or offering solutions. Just being present can be incredibly comforting.
2. Validate their feelings: Acknowledge that their grief is real and significant, no matter what form it takes. This is especially important if they are experiencing disenfranchised grief, where their loss might not be openly recognized or supported by others. Let them know that it’s okay to feel whatever they’re feeling.
3. Normalize their experience: Remind them that grief is a natural response to loss and that there’s no “right” way to grieve. Whether they’re feeling angry, numb, or devastated — all of these emotions are valid. Emphasize that everyone’s grieving process is unique.
4. Encourage professional support: Let them know that it’s okay to seek help from a therapist or counselor. Grief can be overwhelming, and professional support can provide tools and strategies to navigate the healing process. Normalize the idea that going to therapy is a healthy way to process grief — we don’t have to go through it alone.
5. Offer practical help: Sometimes, grief can make it hard to manage everyday tasks. Offering to help with meals, errands, or childcare can alleviate some of the burden. This allows them to focus on their emotional well-being without the added stress of daily responsibilities.

Grief is one of the many things that your MINES Employee Assistance Program (EAP) can support you with. Give us a call – our licensed providers offer free and confidential counseling for grief and many other life situations you may be experiencing.

To your wellbeing,

The MINES Team

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	April 2017: Physical Wellbeing and Grief/Loss
Get Involved! Welcome to the April issue of TotalWellbeing! If you have been following TotalWellbeing you know that every month we focus on one of the 8 Dimensions of Wellbeing. This month we will discuss the effects that grief and loss have on your physical wellbeing. At the same time, we will look at how your physical wellbeing can be a crucial step in successfully working through the stages of grief. Everyone experiences loss and grief differently, but regardless of how you process your loss, keeping up with your physical wellbeing is important. For a closer look at this month’s topic and helpful resources please check out The Path and The Connection below or check out our new infographic here! Next, make sure to catch up on your MINESblog reading because we covered a few important topics over the last month.  Our founder, Dr. Robert Mines provided his perspective around eating disorder awareness week which was February 26 – March 4th. Next, our team member Raena Chatwin explored how you can use imagination and exploration to find joy at work and in all that you do. And finally, to get primed for our talks about grief this month we put the spotlight on grief and the difference between healthy and unhealthy grieving. As always, for more information please check out the links to the left or hit the share button to send us a message. To be notified when we post more resources and articles make sure to subscribe to MINESblog. See you next month!   To your total wellbeing, The MINES Team
The Path: from your Emotional Wellbeing to Managing change When you are feeling down, it can be hard to take the time to exercise or eat properly. However, it is even more important during this time to eat healthily and work out the stress so you can feel better. During exercise, you are given an opportunity process what you are going through and work through the emotions that come along. By focusing on your physical wellbeing during a time of grief and loss, you can ensure that you are not staying in bed and are sticking to your routine, which will actively lead you to be around others who can help you cope with the pain and suffering that comes with grieving a loss. Even if you don’t feel like doing much, try to exercise each day. Take care of your personal needs and eat healthy so that you have the strength to deal with your loss and your other daily responsibilities. This month check out this link to see some easy exercises you can do.
Tips for you: Focus on your physical wellbeing and use that as a tool and motivator while you are navigating the stages of grief. Choose to use your exercise time to reflect about your loss and what you can take away from this loss.  Check out this webinar for more about grief and loss.
The Connection: Get Involved Wellbeing does not simply start and stop at the individual. Our community is connected to each of our own individual wellbeing in a huge way. When we are well we can better function within our community.  We can help our fellow humans thrive, and in turn, when our community is prospering, it helps each of us reach our goals as individuals. So why not help our community so we can all thrive together? Each month we will strive to bring you resources that can help you enhance the wellbeing of those around you or get involved with important causes.
Community Wellbeing Resources: You probably know a co-worker, friend, or family member that is dealing with some type of grief. Take a moment to connect with them to see how you can support them through this time. Maybe even suggest taking the time to walk or work out with them to help their physical wellbeing at the same time. Or you consider running or walking in a marathon to support a cause and be around others who have or are struggling with their own grief and loss. Click here to find an activity near you! Don’t forget that PersonalAdvantage, an online benefit available through MINES, has tons of great resources for all the dimensions of wellbeing that we discuss here, along with some articles and assistance for Change Management. If you haven’t checked it out yet, or want to see what resources they have for this month’s topic check out the link below. You’ll need your company login, so make sure to get that from your employer or email us and we’ll be happy to provide that to you. Check Out PersonalAdvantage Here!
If you or a member of your household needs assistance or guidance on any of these wellbeing topics, please call MINES & Associates, your EAP, today for free, confidential, 24/7 assistance at 800.873.7138.
		MINES does not warrant the materials (Audio, Video, Text, Applications, or any other form of media or links) included in this communication have any connection to MINES & Associates, nor does MINES seek to endorse any entity by including these materials in this communication.  MINES accepts no liability for the consequences of any actions taken on the basis of the information provided herein, nor any additional content that may be made available through any third-party site. We found them helpful, and hope you do too!

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For many of us, experiencing the death of a loved one is debilitating and shocking, but that doesn’t mean that we should sell ourselves to grief. Losing a friend or family member is never something that any two people deal with the same way, but there are coping strategies that can help. According to http://www.helpguide.org/mental/grief_loss.htm, one of the ways to cope with grief and loss is to express your feelings in a tangible or creative way, and that is exactly what Rochette was able to do. Please go to http://www.helpguide.org/mental/grief_loss.htm to read an important article about grief and loss and how you can help yourself get through a difficult time or help someone who has just experienced a great loss. Ultimately, we have to be able to talk about these things in order to stay healthy and reach closure, because we all deserve to live full lives and come to peace with what we may no longer have, but will always love.

Sarah Kinnel

Marketing and Advertising Assistant

The post Coping with Grief and Loss appeared first on MINES and Associates.